and yet again, it was another boring day.

blah blahhs.

after school, went to art room for the fashion design thing. helping out with the make-up, remember? :O

well anyway, feeling kinda stupid myself, cause i am no whatsoever professional or some stuff. *shrugs* just wanted to help out, that's all.

so yeah, there were the models. all so tall. and me feeling so short. ): but oh well, God blessed them with the height and looks, let them make use of what God has given them. (:

and so they had to do the catwalk, to choose who was going to be in.

imagine this: you already being so tall, wearing 3-inch heels, strutting like some super model.

that's crazy. i was like looking at them walk with my mouth wide open (i guess that was how i looked like then.) it's insanely crazy. there was no way i am ever gonna be in 3-inch heels. mad! and most likely, i would never be in heels. yeah i know they are dead gorgeous but i have constrains mann. (muahh legs. ): )

so yeah, and blah blahs stuff.

so did make up for one of the models. pretty yeah. (: sorta nervous though, cause we had this senior who is like so pro lahh. have big make up kit and stuff. all the stuff professionals would have. and me? ohh boy. needless to say. :O well anyway, it turned out better than expected i guess. didn't give her the black eye. :X (i think)

but i need colours. stuck with blue. so i can do nothing much practically. shall read up, watch tutorials and stuff, to improve myself. that's what i call self-learning. (: yeah i know, just watching and not doing is just no use. but well, at least it's better than nothing. gonna think of some designs that can be drawn on the model's faces, just like how the senior did it. using liquid eye liner. goshh.

for a girl who doesn't put on make up, i guess i know pretty much about make up. just need more practice ayee. and the make up, of course. don't have them, how to experiment?

and you might have thought that modeling is gonna be easy. from the way i see it, it's not.

first, you have to put on such heavy make up, gonna irritate your skin if your skin is sensitive. might get to yours eyes. and you can't tear, it's gonna ruin the make up.

next, you have to wear clothings which are not going to be that comfortable. (cause clothes at fashion runways are not meant for wearing outside.) but in our context, the hat is gonna be heavy and hard to manage.

lastly, you have to keep still. maintain your posture. and blahs blahs. oh, and keep in beat. step step step step. :O

so you think modeling is easy? think again. .__.

enough of the blabbering. went home, continued watching 17 again. a show that i missed. it was nice, quite touching. (: teared, ahh but that's normal for charissa.

tomorrow's gonna be like some normal school day. i hope. *cross fingers*

and also, we will most likely get back our results. oh my..

but hey, look at things the positive side. school holidays are round the corner! ^^ 30th october is gonna be the last day of school.

oh wait, why am i so happy? i should be sad, shouldn't i?

i won't get to see my friends anymore. i'm going to a new place. oh mann, i've been dreading that day since i knew i was going for ip. it's like how i left primary school.

and the same cycle continues. you change school, you talk less to your friends. you make new friends. forget the old ones, and that's the end of a sweet friendship.

i hate that feeling. i hate that. i still remember my friends, i do. i remember all my ex best friends. i do i do i do! ): i hate the feeling of leaving. i hate it. i hate it when a friendship is lost.

ahh, i can say all that. why didn't i bother to call them or something? cause you know why? i'm scared. (you can call me a coward for all i care.) people change. their character change. and what? i'm still that little girl ever since i started the path of education. i'm still the same. i looked about the same as i was since i left primary school. even my ex classmate whom i couldn't recognise at first, could recognise me straight away.

i'm scared to go say hi. their different now, not the same friend/best friend i used to know. i don't know how others feel about this. are they feeling the same as how i feel? or they don't cause they've changed.

are they gonna think, 'hey this girl, same as ever, she doesn't change, does she?" idk.

maybe i've changed. but i feel the same. even if i did change, i might have changed for the better. i used to talk back to my parents when i was around 10 or so. and now? i don't think so.

and yeah, now more blabbering. i could just go on and on and on.

i don't know what to feel already. and if you ever see sadness in my eyes though my face just doesn't show it, you would know why.

i have nothing more to say. why does it have to end like this?